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About Traditional Art / Hobbyist Member I am me... АлександраFemale/United States Recent Activity
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there's an overwhelming wave of emotions;
first the confusion, a numb disbelief.
then the panic sets in.
next the anger rises and soon flares to an overspilling boil
complete with swearing and the need to hit something.
that may last the longest especially if you try to douse the flame
but the pent up rage only burns on.

after that the energy is gone.
and you're left feeling fed up.
your limbs get heavier and heavier
and there's the depression and sadness of it.

frustration may burble its way back up
but by the end you'll be so worn out in defeat you'll be back to disbelief
and finally hostile acceptance,
realizing there is nothing you can possibly do despite the desperate want and will for it not to be so.

a breath. a sigh.
a few silent tears after the hot ones of fury,
and then sleep.

because nothing else can take your mind off it,
and, exhausted, you know it is the closing of the book of unwanted end as you, with bile in mouth, accept the loss.
you will try tomorrow to build it back up,
though you know it will never be the same,
never as great,
as before.

and so the numbness fades and the bitterness latches onto you, settling down for good and ever.

the before is gone,
and what will be is not what would have been,
which is the most agonizing fact of all.

Gone and Irreplaceable
take what you will from it, but loss of any kind is horrible, even a simple document - not the master - that you had been editing for months hat somehow disappears when you install new Word onto your computer and though you still have a copy, the loss of four months worth of editing is gone, and there's just. . . just. . . ha. I can't. to bed with me. enjoy the poem.
The rose cease wilts 'pon winter's chill
at sound of your fine name.
And blooms upon your slightest touch,
as does my heart of flame.

No bead of thy fine blood should pool
nor sweat escape your brow
should burden or sharp thorn to prick
upon my love, I vow.

But love you leave me wanting -
my feelings you neglect.
As rose you are, you bear your thorns
and know not their effect.

For all my promised pleasures,
for all my pleading stead,
thy thorns of sweetest treachery
are placed upon my head.

What love is this, of yours I thought,
that eyes light up in lies.
For never would a wolf have seen
a carcass in disguise.

For ner would I have thought you so,
but aye, you came to be
None any love or liking mine -
Ere you never came to me.

As rose does wilt, it does decay.
I find my love for you doth stray.
And you and love are plucked away.
Lo, Eve and temptress I do slay.
Hmmmm, we I have not updated a journal for a long while so I thought I would give anyone who might be curious (is there anyone out therefree peekaboo avvy  any one at all watching me and what I've doing??? thank you if so ^-^ if not, aww well, I will keep writing this anyways)
Ahem.Kitty Cat 
I have been writing stories for a very long time. I am young (ish) yet I have not ever finished the book I started three years ago. BUT I have continued regularly working on it over the years. and would you know it, that one - which I never intended to get anywhere, sprouted into another one, and from there actually three. . . and four. . . and wouldn't you know it that book has turned into a series of FIVE stories,NO WAY???  with a timeline and lots of people and love and care into my own personal fandom world XD. It just sort of exploded on me.
Now. A couple of weeks ago my mind blew up on me and I CONNECTED all five stories I has been brewing in my mind with one thing.Woohooooo!  (nooooo spoooilersss *Riversong) So I will not mention what, BUT THE POINT IS that I have been working diligently, taking advantage of my brain while it is not locked up with writer's block. I would LIKE to finish the first book by Christmas. I mean, that isn't too far fetched right?:yes:  I had hoped to have it finished a long time ago, but not I think I could really do it :D So excite in my own little brain world. So stay tuned for updated chapters on Trapped in Light's Shadow (title yet pending  . . ) as well as reuploaded, edited versions of previous chapters.
ON ANOTHER NOTE. I have been painting some things more recently - mainly fandom shoes for friends. So I will have more finished pictures of them up soon. I just finished a pair a week ago or so and they will be up right after this ^-^ Feeling very good about getting work out there again, even with personal struggles in depression and anxiety. BUT I TRUDGE ON. *Determination OMG MOAR POEMS! , Positivity:iconpositivityplz: ! work work work! So I will see you guys out there excited happy 


Alaminia's Profile Picture
I am me... Александра
Artist | Hobbyist | Traditional Art
United States
Favourite genre of music: Broadway? and anything but country. haha my music has screamo, jazz, classic rock, classical piano and violin XD christian stuff, soft rock, pop, rap, musicals and punk :D
Favourite style of art: i love it all but i prefer fantasy stuff and looking at digital. i paint in watercolor and draw in pencil
MP3 player of choice: don't have an ipod or anything. just listen to stuff on my computer wherever i go
Wallpaper of choice: dA art :D
Skin of choice: mine? idk haha
Favourite cartoon character: Tweety Bird
Personal Quote: theres no such things as normal in a world of indaviduals

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Judilda Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
Thank you for the fav!! Love 
If you are interested in commission...…
icefire5689 Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2014  Student General Artist
Thank you for adding "Priestess" and "Wind Spirit" to your +fav! [:
sinribbon Featured By Owner Feb 7, 2014  Student General Artist
Thank you for the :+fav:s!! :huggle:
BlackSpiralDancer1 Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Hey, thank you for adding my picture to your collection! :D :huggle:
RukiaFanGirl Featured By Owner Dec 24, 2013
Thank you for the favourite :)
AprilLight Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2013
Thank you so much for faves my friend :heart::iconaheartforyou:
OneWingedSoul Featured By Owner Dec 17, 2013
Thanks for the fav :3
x-Memoire-x Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:wow:Thanks for the fav!:woohoo::hooray:
Hope you have a nice day!:hug:
Eeddey Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you for adding Elsa by Eeddey to your Favorites! :happybounce:
RI-Art Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thank you so much ;) 
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